Apologies to Samzidata readers if you have already seen this, but I had not, and boy, this is just gooooooood.
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Well, here is a good way to start the week. The photo reminded me of a joke I heard somewhere. Back in the 1950s, the-then President, Eisenhower, was famed for enjoying his golf. There was apparently a bumper sticker around at the time that said something along the lines of, “If We Wanted A Golfer President, Vote Ben Hogan”. That’s quite funny, but at least Ike, given his pretty weighty military record and – in my view – pretty decent performance in the Oval Office – was a better president than the current occupant. (H/T: Instapundit) June 21st, 2010 | 21 comments - (Comments are closed)
 This is one of the more hilarious spoofs of PETA I have seen in ages. It recently showed up in my Inbox and I simply must share it with you, our readers: Johnstown, PA (GlossyNews) – Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers “duct taped inside several fast food restaurant dumpsters,” according to police officials. “Something just went wrong,” said a still visibly shaken organizer of the protest. “Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong.” The organizer said a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, “growing tired of throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather or fur coats,” decided to protest the annual motorcycle club event “in a hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their clothing and motor bike seats.” “In fact,” said the organizer, “motorcycle gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it… ergo, they should stop.” According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960’s era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting “you’re murderers” to passers by. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha began. “They peed on me!!!” charged one activist. “They grabbed me, said I looked like I was French, started calling me ‘La Trene’, and duct taped me to a tree so they could pee on me all day!” “I… I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather jacket, and he… he didn’t even care. I called him a murderer, and all he said was, ‘You can’t prove that.’ Next thing I know he forced me to ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and would not let me off, because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman.” Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers “farted on their heads.” Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the ongoing nature of the investigation, however, organizers for the motorcycle club rally expressed “surprise” at the allegations.. “That’s preposterous,” said one high-ranking member of the biker organizing committee. “We were having a party, and these people showed up and were very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party! What could be more friendly than that? You know, just because we are all members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make them feel welcome.” When confronted with the allegations of force-feeding the activists meat, using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food restaurant dumpsters, and ‘farting on their heads,’ the organizer declined to comment in detail. “That’s just our secret handshake,” assured the organizer. June 7th, 2010 | 20 comments - (Comments are closed)
The above video, in which Australian(*) comedian John Clarke gives a witheringly succinct summary of the present European fiscal crisis, has been making the rounds of certain parts of the internet in recent days. It is great to see Clarke’s work getting attention in the world outside Australia, because he has been putting stuff as good as this out on a weekly basis for decades now. In fact it would be nice if Australian political satire became better appreciated in the world outside Australia more generally, because the totally tactless take no prisoners approach that much of it has can at times be refreshing in the world of bullshit in which we live. (Seriously, can you imagine anyone of any other nationality pulling off this?) While John Clarke’s mock interviews are often hysterically funny, perhaps his greatest piece of work is the television series The Games, that ran on Australian television in 1998 and 2000. This series was a mock documentary that supposedly chronicled officials organising the Sydney 2000 Olympic games. It showed idiotic bureaucrats getting into all kinds of dubious scandals of incompetence, massive waste, and corruption. The first series of this program ran several years before the Sydney games, and was met by a certain amount of bafflement by audiences as the fact that the Olympics were indeed being run by incompetent idiots was not at that point widely appreciated. By the year 2000, actual scandals had occurred to such an extent that the program looked like a rather mild reflection of reality. The second series ran immediately before the Olympics in 2000, and people watched it, nodded, and rather wished that reality was not like that. Two years out from the London Olympics of 2012, we have seen nothing anywhere near this harsh in the British media. Perhaps this is because British television lacks the viciousness of certain parts of Australian television. (Print media are completely the other way round. Australian newspapers entirely lack the viciousness of the London tabloids). If the BBC or any of the other television networks over here had any style, they would simply take the Australian program from 1998 and run it. In prime time. (*) Clarke is actually a New Zealander, in about the same sense that William Shatner is a Canadian. June 3rd, 2010 | 9 comments - (Comments are closed)
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. – Groucho Marx May 22nd, 2010 | 10 comments - (Comments are closed)
As seen in a signature on a Star Wars: The Old Republic games forum: [Luke:] I can’t believe it. [Yoda:] That is why you fail. [Ayn Rand:] Success does not come from believing in a steaming pile of mystic gibberish, you stupid little green man [ignites her lightsabre and advances threateningly] – Act IV, The Fountainhead Strikes Back May 21st, 2010 | 19 comments - (Comments are closed)
It has been said elsewhere that the Leader demanded ‘cash’ from the Icelandic types, and they thought he said ‘ash’. – Commenter ‘Chuckles‘ April 16th, 2010 | 4 comments - (Comments are closed)
Well, as it is St Patrick’s Day, I cannot think of a person more able to sum up certain features of Irish culture than Denis Leary. (Not safe for all work environments). March 17th, 2010 | 14 comments - (Comments are closed)
Well, the days are getting longer, I have even seen quite a bit of the yellow thing in the sky, and I was woken up this morning by some randy pigeons on my terraced roof, so let’s take it away, Mr Tom Lehrer: Spring is here, a-suh-puh-ring is here. All the world seems in tune When they see us coming, the birdies all try an’ hide, Lalaalaalalaladoodiedieedoodoodoo We’ve gained notoriety, So if sunday you’re free, We’ll murder them all amid laughter and merriment. March 8th, 2010 | 5 comments - (Comments are closed)
If you want an, er, interesting take on the global warming alarmist/doomonger/population-controller mindset, check this out. Not safe for work, well, at least not in some offices I know of. March 3rd, 2010 | 5 comments - (Comments are closed)
Trawling around some sites to find a corporate statement, I came across this gem: “Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to Attend The Daily Beast’s Women in the World Summit.” Blimey. Is the writer of that headline channelling the late Evelyn Waugh? March 1st, 2010 | 5 comments - (Comments are closed)
The Nobel Prize winning economist and columnist, Paul Krugman, does his best to annoy crusty free market ideologues such as myself with his sheer, implacable wrongness. It stuns me that the craziest remark in the post I link to here is not actually made up, but something he actually wrote. Perhaps he should do Saturday Night Live. January 22nd, 2010 | 9 comments - (Comments are closed)
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