US Marines were handed an unexpected defeat yesterday and commentators are scrambling to find how this could have been allowed to happen. Reporters interviews dazed survivors at Bagram Airbase, near Kabul. Capt. Hank McHunter, from Dallas, Texas said
I called for support from an AC-130 but it all happened too fast… they got in among us so all our airpower didn’t mean diddly squat. I want my wife, Becky-Sue, to know I’m okay though.
Sgt. Bud Burbacker from Oraldo, Florida added
Our defence was holdin’ okay but then one of them got through and it all went totally down the shitter. Where the hell are them friggin’ Northern Alliance bastards when you need ’em?
A reporter for the Independent attempted to put this question to Dr. Abdullah Abdullah, the foreign minister in Kabul. He replied
Who’s that? Robert Fisk? Shove it, Fisk, I ain’t talking to you, you slimy piece of…
However Deputy Defence Minister with the Interim government, General Abdul Rashid Dostam, promised he would make more information available to the selected members of the Western media later tonight
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your pubic regions, Fisk. If you want to know what the Northern Alliance position is regarding this incident, then send two bottles of good Kentucky Bourbon and that most excellent Lara Logan chick, you know, that reporter who works for GMTV, to my HQ later tonight and I’ll tell her all about it
During a press briefing at the Pentagon, Donald Rumsfeld was evasive on the exact details but did indicate an enquiry was underway to find out how this could have transpired
Yes, we were quite suprised to hear what has happened… we didn’t even think those bastards knew the rules! It would be fair to say I am pissed as I had ten bucks on our guys to win. Oh well, war is hell and it cannot be refined.
SkyNew showed video of US Marines and British Royal Marines playing American football after a large Christmas lunch at Bagram Airbase. The Royal Marines narrowly won.
[Editor’s note: This would have been posted yesterday but for the intervention of the hacker who disrupted blogger.com… may the fleas of a thousand camels infest his public regions too]
