The Onion just keeps on getting better.
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13 comments to Beware of alligators |
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Don’t suppose this guy was testing this out, then?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/4764799.stm
‘The Onion’ has always been a hoot.
There are a number of video clips on the Web, easy enough to find hence no link, showing various drunks &/or tired-of-life exhibitionists attempting to be trustingly familiar with crocs & gators….together with the consequences.
It is ironic that our leaders exhibit the same cavalier attitude to small-brained but highly dangerous animals, in their dealings with Islamic radicals. But I suppose that the learning process simply escapes some people.
As if we need any more reminders of alligator’s verociousness: Killere Gator Caught and Slain in FL
Um, yeah, you’d think someone living in Florida would know that dangling your legs off a bridge over a canal was called “fishing with live bait”.
I’m reliably told that the unfortunate victim, a professional model, was sick of men and paparazzi “treating her like a piece of meat.”
It’s nice to see The Onion is still so funny today. Here’s my favourite article from that publication – published in the early days of the online edition – Somebody Should Do Something About All the Problems. Not only is it hilarious, I also like it for its insightful parody of the common partnership of cognitive dissonance and will to statism that can be found in so many citizens.
Am I the only one who doesn’t find any of that hilarious? A hint of a smile? Perhaps. A laugh? Not a chance.
Could well be.
He probably wouldn’t appreciate that famous Southern epitaph:
Here, hold my beer and watch this.
Apparently, there is a serial killer alligator. Three women chomped down in as many days, wow, what a statistical blip, eh? Two of the gators involved were found with their victims arms in their bellies, the third victim was found sticking out of the gators maw by friends. Apparently surveys say that two out of three gators like chick-en wings….
Maybe the victims were just all on the same cycle…
Leapin’ lizards.
In a similar vein, there is a large number of eco-nutters that make the pilgrimage to Alaska to live among Grizzley Bears. Similar results. The bears eventually get tired of smelly long haired types hanging about and eventually add them to the dinner menu.
The bears eventually get tired of smelly long haired types hanging about and eventually add them to the dinner menu.
Perhaps the bears could be developing a pavlovian response to the smell of patchouli oil?
Sounds like a self-correcting problem, IMO.
The State of Florida is seriously considering importing some wild Tigers and Lions to live in residential neighborhoods….
People do not seem to mind living with dangerous man-eating animals there. They’re often afraid, and they complain a lot; especially when someone is attacked or killed, but, heck, it’s coooool!