It has been a while since I have visited the Dave Barry blog. So I had good reason to hope that when I went back there this evening I would find things of splendour and significance. I did. This, I think, was the best thing I found.
Garry I hate to break it to you. But the world is on the brink of disaster. World crime is at an all time high. And the only thing standing between order … and chaos … is us.
And then, the bit that really got my attention:
From the creators of South Park.
Relax. This is a movie. The world is not really on the brink of disaster. It just has to seem that way for entertainment purposes. It opens, somewhere – in London also perhaps? – on October 15th.
“Hey terrorists. Terrorise this.”
Indeed.
I also found this quite encouraging.
Spiders are more scary than terrorists – at least according to a survey of a thousand Britons released Monday.
Household creepy crawlies frighten Britons more than terrorist attacks, or even death, the survey found.
Which makes sense to me, and fits in with my experience. I am, I feel, far more likely to be terrorised by a creepy crawly than by a terrorist. After all, the War Against Terrorism has, in London, so far, touch wood and hope not to die, been going quite well, in the sense that none of London has been blotted out by terrorists recently.
On the other hand, we all know that the War Against Creepy Crawlies can only ever be a holding operation, and is doomed to eventual failure.
Odd thing is when I was younger I had no problem with spiders. I used to collect them (including Black Widows!) in bug containers and play with jumping spiders in California. But now I’m a bit freaked out by spiders, I don’t get it. :/
TO: Brian Micklethwait
RE: Fear Not!
“On the other hand, we all know that the War Against Creepy Crawlies can only ever be a holding operation, and is doomed to eventual failure.” — Brian Micklethwait
Sure. They’ve got the numbers. But you’ve got the brains, Brian.
Support nanotech. Build nanites to disassemble the bloody bugs in your flat.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
“we all know that the War Against Creepy Crawlies can only ever be a holding operation, and is doomed to eventual failure.” — Brian Micklethwait
There is hope yet. We can convene an international summit meeting, and , joining together the rhetoric talents of all our leaders we can bore them to death.
Alas, the film is not released in London until January 15. (Release dates in various countries here). Apparently the film is principally a parody of Jerry Bruckheimer summer action movies, but done with puppets. It is also apparently hilarious.
Here in The Principality they’re playing the Kerry movie and the Che movie. I’ll have to drive to West Windsor.
I wonder why it’s rated R?
If only we had the courage to address the causes of the misery and despair of the creepy crawlies, they would stop frightening us so much.
>I wonder why it’s rated R?
Actually it was initially rated NC-17, and substantial cuts had to be made to the puppet sex scene before it could even get an R. (Yes, this is just as silly as it sounds).
Can it finally be acknowledged that we’ve reduced the threat of spiders to “nuisance”? The kids in Beslan want to know.
The are reports in the US that Sean Penn is ticked at the way he is being portrayed in the movie. I believe he is thinking of sueing them. Yet again a demonstration of the Hollywood left having no sense of humour.
Is there a “Global Test” for deciding which creepy-crawlies should be killed or captured? I am sure John F. Kerry needs to know.
My girlfriend is terrified of em, even though she has admirably Mark-Steyish views about the WoT. Weird.
Andrew Ian Dodge: Sean Penn is a tool. I think his brief marriage to Madonna scrambled his brain.
I can’t stay silent any longer. Pete Rossi looks nothing like the original Meatloaf. As for power, energy and drama….come on!
The MPAA apparently felt that a “graphic” sex scene between puppets (namely, penetration, but also a “golden shower” scene) was just too much to bear, but a Hans Blix ppuppet being torn to shreds by a pack of sharks was OK. So much for international diplomacy, which should let those know not residing in the US that the MPAA is made up of a commitee of “Salt of the Earth” types who seem to have some intangible grasp of what’s worthy of presentation to an American audience. For those of you who wish, here’s a review posted on aintitcoolnews:
http://www.aintitcoolnews.com/display.cgi?id=18606
Thanks for keeping a cool blog! Now I must go and terminate some pesky spiders dangling from the rafters!
Cheers!