Some readers will have observed that I fight an often lonely battle against the forces of the militant lesbian, anti-humanist, fascist, tree-hugging puritan conspiracy to wipe out masculinity. We know as a scientific fact that the best lovers are larger men. I have previously commented on the sexual inadequacy of skinny types.
It is therefore clear that the current obesity obsession in this country is part of a nefarious conspiracy aimed at wiping out Great Britain. Was Henry VIII skinny? Did Winston Churchill eat tofu?
Help is at hand in the form of a marvelous new book Eat What you Want and Die Like a Man: The World’s Unhealthiest Cookbook. The reason for this masterpiece is set out in the Foreword:
I wrote this book because I was tired of being told what to eat. I was tired of the Food Pyramid and vegetable oil and small food. I was tired of pinch-faced little people who actually got angry when I talked about lard and egg yolks. I felt it was time for a backlash. Time to celebrate things like bacon grease and heavy cream. Don’t we have better things to feel guilty about? Like the resurgence of velour?
This is not a serious cookery book, says the author. No doubt he could be sued by the pinch-faced little people.
This book sounds fantastic – two thumbs up on the premise. But I have to ask: How does having mouths and tongues that are more sensitive to taste and feeling make men better lovers? I don’t see the connection.
Fonda,
Ever hear of a cunning linguist?
Fonda:
We have more sensory receptors on our lips and mouths: better kissers, among other things.
I have found that those who are sniffy about overweight people and are not overweight themselves are often chain smokers. They bang smugly on about eating less and exercising more, when their real secret weapon is three packs a day.
Kissing a guy who smokes is like licking an ashtray clean. I’d kiss an overweight guy before I’d kiss a smoker, anyday.
Antoine,
In the battle against the Nannies, girlymen and busybodies who would turn us into women, you may be lonely, but you’re not alone.
It’s also worth looking at the author’s website: http://www.littletinylies.com
There are even more recipies with wonderfully calorie laden food.
Sorry, but how does having extra sensitive mouths make you better in bed? Does having other parts that are extra sensitive automatically make one a better lover?
Have you seen: Chris Muir’s Day by Day for the 5th and 6th of July?
Tom
Will Michael Moore buy the movie rights to the book?
Can we recommend this book for Sheik Omar Abdel-Rahman?
Thanks for the link!
The check is in the mail.
You know what they say about health food: it doesn’t make you live longer, it just makes it seem longer.