Very Dim Sums

At last, someone is doing something to curb the terrifying menace of the Flying Spring Roll:

Yum cha restaurants in Chinatown will now have to train workers who push food carts to pass a “driving licence” under new regulations from Sydney City Council.

The move comes after a spate of accidents in which novice or careless trolley-pushers have crashed carts, injuring or making a mess of patrons and co-workers.

In one case last year, an elderly customer at a large yum cha restaurant was covered in plates of sticky black bean sauce after a trolley waitress lost her load while she was text messaging on her mobile phone.

Waitress was texting: “going to spoil rude customers day…ha…ha…ha..”

In another incident in 2002, a yum cha trolley waiter lost control of a cart laden with steamed dumpling as she was trundling down a steep ramp between levels of a Chinatown restaurant. The dumpling cart ended up ploughing head on into an unattended trolley at the bottom.

The unattended trolley spent several weeks in hospital and is still convalescing. It cannot sleep at nights, suffers from flashbacks, life has been ruined etc etc.

After completing the course, they will be required to carry a small “L” plate on their carts for six months before being granted full licences. Learners can only push a cart while accompanied by fully licensed waiting staff.

Too little, too late. Reckless trolley pushers are a danger to us all. Get those tax-cameras up now! And don’t try to tell me that all those steamed dumplings are not adding to the threat of global warming. Save the planet from the greedy, capitalist Trolley Menace now!!